Summer is almost over!!! Here in the Northwest the weather has already given in and we're seeing cool temps and leaves falling.
I'm scared for my baby. About a month ago we began talking about school. Two weeks ago the behaviors began revving up and they haven't shown any sign of letting up. Piper's stim's from a full two years ago showed up for the party. Good times.
What is there to be so nervous about?
Everything.
New school, new teacher, and a new daycare.
Poor Piper. She's not enjoying being dsyregulated either. She was echolalicly stimming a line from her favorite documentary of the moment I tried redirecting her and then asked "are you able to stop?" and the look she gave me was one of I wish I could and she said "no, I can't Mommy". Broke. My. Heart.
I'm not feeling any less anxious as there have been several last minute major snafu's perpetrated by her school district and her new teacher whom we've never met hasn't bothered to return my calls to set up a before the first day meeting. I'm not inspired or excited and if I wasn't the sole financial support for this child I would be homeschooling. Color me NOT impressed.
The only reason I am happy about going back to school is that it means her father wont be at my house every day to care for Pie. He's been staying with her at my house while school's been out. I set up a kind of "camp" for them with weekly activities. He has even taught her to read and speak more than 50 Spanish vocabulary words. She has enjoyed him being more involved and I am happy to hear speak with pride about her Dad.
Mixed blessings. I guess I am used to that.
I for one hate this time of year. BAH! Here's to the speedy arrival of October, friends. I raise my glass to you!
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Friday, June 11, 2010
On the Bench
I always knew I would be a Mom. It was a certainty. I had no real idea what form of motherhood I would be blessed with but I was ready for it all. Step child? no problem, I'm from a blended family myself. Adopted? I'd raise her and love her like my own. Bio Mom? Sure thing!
Of course, I wasn't prepared to have a child with special needs. It never even crossed my mind and I scoffed at Piper's dad when he brought it up during my pregnanacy. Bah! Those things happen to other people not me and my precious girl.
Don't you just love how life comes along to educate you?
So here I am in the full bloom of motherhood 7 years later. Rasing a beautiful soul who was an enexpected but welcome gift to my life. She's made me rich. I have lovingly (and sometimes painfully) received every gift she has offered. I'm trying my best to give her what she needs.
One of Piper's favorite activites is to swim. It looks more like organized drowning but she's happy and safe so who cares? I'll tell ya who. The bench. Do you have this bench at your activites? The bench of the typical Moms sitting on the sidelines chatting casualy with eachother? Talking about typical things?
I'm gonna be honest, I HATE that damm bench.
I'm exhausted by the time we get to these things since I begin my day at 3:30am every day. By the time we get to swim I've worked an 8 hour day, rushed to get Pie from school, had snack and playtime and then rushed out again for the activity. Sometimes I just want to enjoy my girl and not have to be the "advocate" the "educator". I just want to sit there and watch my baby's joy. Piper loves the water. LOVES it. She is as fond of a pool as she is of a puddle or a bath. Water makes her happy and calm. Mostly. The local pool we swim at is a flurry of activity. There are 3 classes going on simultaneously and a radio on playing music over the PA. We've had moslty group lesson for cost reasons and have had minimal success staying focused. I have worked with the staff closely to reduce the outside distractions (the radio is now off for her lessons and the swim meet teacher doesn't yell as much). We've made adaptations to help Piper but it's still challenging for the teacher to focus on her as well as the other kids cause Pie is so distracted she doesn't stay with the group. As a result, everyone within ear shot knows my daughter's name. To the uneducated her behavior looks like she's and out of controll, spoiled kid who wont listen to the teacher. To the trained eye she presents as a socialy motivated kid with ASD. I don't enjoy sitting on that bench with the other mothers. I can feel the looks from the other parents as they begin to see her differences. It's hard to watch her struggle with, what are for me, simple requests. That half hour has seemed like agony and I can't say how many times I wanted to crawl under a rock. Ugh.
Guess what I did?
I've changed my strategy!
PRIVATE lessons. Oh la la we are so chic! I had a preconcieved idea that private lesson are for "wealthy" kids and not po'folk like ourselves but I finaly investigated and it is NOT out of our range. It's the perfect solution and she is learning and thriving! We may go back to group lessons someday but for now this is what's working. Her teacher is patient and kind and has worked with other ASD kids, and best of all she is completly focused on Piper alone for a full half hour.
You know what else is working? I am enjoying the bench. I'm not chatting up the other moms yet, but I am getting more comfortable. I no longer sit in vigil evey muscle tense waiting to spring up and help out or willing Piper to perform. I can just relax and trust her teacher is keeping her engaged and safe. It's no longer obvious to everyone withinn earshot that my gal struggles. I call that a victory.
Of course, I wasn't prepared to have a child with special needs. It never even crossed my mind and I scoffed at Piper's dad when he brought it up during my pregnanacy. Bah! Those things happen to other people not me and my precious girl.
Don't you just love how life comes along to educate you?
So here I am in the full bloom of motherhood 7 years later. Rasing a beautiful soul who was an enexpected but welcome gift to my life. She's made me rich. I have lovingly (and sometimes painfully) received every gift she has offered. I'm trying my best to give her what she needs.
One of Piper's favorite activites is to swim. It looks more like organized drowning but she's happy and safe so who cares? I'll tell ya who. The bench. Do you have this bench at your activites? The bench of the typical Moms sitting on the sidelines chatting casualy with eachother? Talking about typical things?
I'm gonna be honest, I HATE that damm bench.
I'm exhausted by the time we get to these things since I begin my day at 3:30am every day. By the time we get to swim I've worked an 8 hour day, rushed to get Pie from school, had snack and playtime and then rushed out again for the activity. Sometimes I just want to enjoy my girl and not have to be the "advocate" the "educator". I just want to sit there and watch my baby's joy. Piper loves the water. LOVES it. She is as fond of a pool as she is of a puddle or a bath. Water makes her happy and calm. Mostly. The local pool we swim at is a flurry of activity. There are 3 classes going on simultaneously and a radio on playing music over the PA. We've had moslty group lesson for cost reasons and have had minimal success staying focused. I have worked with the staff closely to reduce the outside distractions (the radio is now off for her lessons and the swim meet teacher doesn't yell as much). We've made adaptations to help Piper but it's still challenging for the teacher to focus on her as well as the other kids cause Pie is so distracted she doesn't stay with the group. As a result, everyone within ear shot knows my daughter's name. To the uneducated her behavior looks like she's and out of controll, spoiled kid who wont listen to the teacher. To the trained eye she presents as a socialy motivated kid with ASD. I don't enjoy sitting on that bench with the other mothers. I can feel the looks from the other parents as they begin to see her differences. It's hard to watch her struggle with, what are for me, simple requests. That half hour has seemed like agony and I can't say how many times I wanted to crawl under a rock. Ugh.
Guess what I did?
I've changed my strategy!
PRIVATE lessons. Oh la la we are so chic! I had a preconcieved idea that private lesson are for "wealthy" kids and not po'folk like ourselves but I finaly investigated and it is NOT out of our range. It's the perfect solution and she is learning and thriving! We may go back to group lessons someday but for now this is what's working. Her teacher is patient and kind and has worked with other ASD kids, and best of all she is completly focused on Piper alone for a full half hour.
You know what else is working? I am enjoying the bench. I'm not chatting up the other moms yet, but I am getting more comfortable. I no longer sit in vigil evey muscle tense waiting to spring up and help out or willing Piper to perform. I can just relax and trust her teacher is keeping her engaged and safe. It's no longer obvious to everyone withinn earshot that my gal struggles. I call that a victory.
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Product Reccomendations
I love a good testimonial. I could have made millions of dollars. If only all of the recommending I do for all the products I can't live without were paid advertisements by the companies that make the crap I'm so jazzed about. I practically sell the stuff! blarg. I already have a day job.
Anyhoooo, stuff. Stuff that works. Things that make life just a little bit easier, the right tool. I LOVE it! This really greases my wheels, lights my fire and well....it's silly but um yeah. I really like stuff that works.
Same goes for this bloggy bloggy world. The stories and the "yeah. I've so lived that" moments and the tears and the joy. The community. The kindness. The love. The beauty of anothers words, making me feel it, making me see it through her eyes and feel every deliciously painful/joyful moment. Triumphs and tribulations. I cannot describe what all this makes me feel. I don't think I need to, because you get it don't you?
So that's my recommendation: Find your we of me.
Anyhoooo, stuff. Stuff that works. Things that make life just a little bit easier, the right tool. I LOVE it! This really greases my wheels, lights my fire and well....it's silly but um yeah. I really like stuff that works.
Same goes for this bloggy bloggy world. The stories and the "yeah. I've so lived that" moments and the tears and the joy. The community. The kindness. The love. The beauty of anothers words, making me feel it, making me see it through her eyes and feel every deliciously painful/joyful moment. Triumphs and tribulations. I cannot describe what all this makes me feel. I don't think I need to, because you get it don't you?
So that's my recommendation: Find your we of me.
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
AHHHH!
I am processing. I am not processing on the page. All the action is in my head. IEP has come and gone. Piper's goals are well set and reachable but challenging. What's got me spinning is the idea of a new school.
Piper's teacher for the past two years has been Mr. T. He loves my baby. He cares for her like one of his own and school has been a safe place for her because of his presence. I know that she is safe and cared for with Mr. T. Piper has him wrapped around her little finger. He CARES. He cares so much he's willing to do what's best for her even though it's not what his heart wants. He has proposed a new program at a different school for Piper. After investigating, it is the right move at the right time. It is what she needs and I am grateful he was able to see that.
Now we wait...which school will it be?
Piper's teacher for the past two years has been Mr. T. He loves my baby. He cares for her like one of his own and school has been a safe place for her because of his presence. I know that she is safe and cared for with Mr. T. Piper has him wrapped around her little finger. He CARES. He cares so much he's willing to do what's best for her even though it's not what his heart wants. He has proposed a new program at a different school for Piper. After investigating, it is the right move at the right time. It is what she needs and I am grateful he was able to see that.
Now we wait...which school will it be?
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
La la la random
Piper want's a VW camper van (like Daddy's) for our summer's camping excurssions.
I am taking a Zumba class.
It's raining today, of course.
The bush on the other side of the crosswalk outside Piper's school has 139 berries.
We will be taking another route to avoid the daily counting of the berries on said bush from now on.
We have a re-eval IEP in a few short weeks.
Piper mistakenly called me Daddy the other day and it hurt my feelings.
Piper said she wants to start a reptile collection.
I am not really fond of reptiles.
Spicy dark chocolate is a gift from the gods.
Claire Danes is starring in an HBO movie about Temple Grandin.
I am struggling with the mess I've been left to clean up by Jerkwad.
La la la la la
I am taking a Zumba class.
It's raining today, of course.
The bush on the other side of the crosswalk outside Piper's school has 139 berries.
We will be taking another route to avoid the daily counting of the berries on said bush from now on.
We have a re-eval IEP in a few short weeks.
Piper mistakenly called me Daddy the other day and it hurt my feelings.
Piper said she wants to start a reptile collection.
I am not really fond of reptiles.
Spicy dark chocolate is a gift from the gods.
Claire Danes is starring in an HBO movie about Temple Grandin.
I am struggling with the mess I've been left to clean up by Jerkwad.
La la la la la
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